Birth | Pregnancy | Blog

Still having some technical difficulties, but I miss the blog, so here I am anyway.

I haven’t blogged because my main computer had a Trojan Horse, which froze everything. I couldn’t do squat. It took awhile to figure out what had happened, clear it up and be sure all was well again. Actually, I’m still cautious because I’m still having a little trouble which I suspect may be related to the same problem. The blog seems better anyway, thanks to my dear husband, so hopefully I’m good to go now.

Thank you, Russell, I love you too.

Anyway, this just reminded me that technology fails sometimes. A machine is just a machine. It can’t do more that it is programmed or designed to do. Just like is said in this BMJ letter:

It does not deliver medical care: the personnel and equipment do.

Okay, so I’d say the equipment doesn’t deliver medical care either, but the personnel use the equipment.

My computer incident was a reminder to me that people have become very dependent on technology and all that goes along with it, including new and synthesized drugs.

Our bodies will take care of themselves if we take care of them. In other words, we need to quit putting garbage into our bodies. We need to get to know our bodies better, and our children should be properly taught how bodies work so they can grow up knowing what is good and bad for a body.

I don’t mean just education about drugs, alcohol, and contraceptives. I’m talking about how the body actually functions. The intricacies of our own bodies are much more fascinating than mechanics if you ask me, and I like mechanics too. Our bodies are more technologically advanced than any computer so far. They are full of life and energy, and when we attempt to “play God” and alter nature, well, then human error may come into play, just like with my computer, our cars, appliances, and whatever other luxuries we chose to enjoy.

Do you realize the wonder of the uterus? It’s absolutely amazing when you consider what it does. First of all, it starts our rather small, like about the size of a pear, and about the same shape too. Then when you are pregnant, it grows with the baby. Like right now, I look like I have a basket ball under my shirt, or maybe a large round watermelon.

And would you know that despite all that stretching, I can feel contractions now and then? It gives, unlike the belts in my car. Then of course, there is all the skin on the outside covering it all too. That also gives, unfortunately, I haven’t gotten it to go completely back to pre-pregnancy days, but I can get it back to the same “size” without cosmetic surgery. Car belts, old t-shirts, and even elastic bands don’t do that! Once they are stretched, they are stretched.

It never fails, as long as I am good to my body, my body is good to me. Technology fails. It breaks, wears out, or becomes faulty due to human error, whether it was something in the manufacture of it or the use of it.

From the news in BMJ is this blurb: Diagnostic equipment misused in India. Are we to think that New Delhi is the only place in the world where this could happen? I think that would be naive.

Radiologists say that they have also seen cases where gynœcologists mistake normal fetal anatomy for defects and recommend termination of pregnancy.

Have you checked your doctor’s credentials and experience? This would be rather serious. I recently read in Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth, that in the USA ultrasound purchases and use aren’t even regulated. I found “Safe Use Guidelines” for Canada, but who knows what exists here or around the world otherwise? Not that I’m totally against ultrasound, I’ve had them too. I’m only saying “Beware.”

On a lesser note, when I was in the hospital in labor with my second child, they never did get the fetal monitor to work right, and when my baby came out limp and lifeless with a terrible color, it was very clear to me and my husband that he had been in a great amount of distress. Would we have done things differently if we had known? Maybe. I feel very blessed that he ended up okay. No harm came to him. Perhaps things would have gone worse if we had known, I don’t know. I’m just glad he’s okay. In fact, he is great.

The next day, technology failed us again. They had a new ear testing device with large “head phones” for infant ears. Dumb if you ask me, but anyway. It wasn’t working either. It gave a false alarm that something was wrong with one of his ears. It was brand new, so not worn out or anything like that, but perhaps it was being misused. We were pretty certain his hearing was fine because he seemed to respond to the sounds we made, talking, snapping fingers, and so on. We returned to the hospital anyway for a follow up which confirmed our thoughts in the matter, he was fine there as well. Whew!

How many false alarms result in un-necessary interventions? How many times is a necessary intervention not taken because some equipment isn’t working properly or personnel don’t know how to use it properly?

It’s my body. Who should know it best, me or some stranger with a cold, uncaring machine? If we are going to be so technologically advanced, we should at least know ourselves first, don’t you think?

Don’t be frightened into technology (or out of it either for that matter). Technology is merely there to help us when we are uncertain or don’t know our bodies well yet. It should not be relied upon to get us through, and of course should be used by people who genuinely know how to use it. Medical equipment is a tool, nothing more. If the tool or person using it are faulty, the results may be also.

Yes, I can tell you what lots of parts of a fetus are on an ultrasound, but I don’t have experience at all about how big something should measure at what gestational age and so on. Just because I can point things out to you does not mean I’d know what I’m doing if I used one. If you are having an ultrasound, your doctor should be able to walk and talk you through the whole thing, explaining measurements and what they signify. Ultrasounds can be incredibly detailed and show you every nook and cranny of your baby and it’s insides.

Knowledgeable doctors make great body mechanics. They know how to spot and fix the broken stuff, but if it ain’t broke, why fix it?

The “assignment” for today? Go to YouTube.com and type “ultrasound” in the search bar, then click search. Check out some ultrasounds. They have lots of “4D” ones now, which I haven’t gotten used to yet, but they are still neat. Some of them are better than others. Some get labeled, most that I watched did not. Some are put to music and others you can hear a little discussion about what they are looking at. The more detailed (and informative) the discussion, the better.

Have a great one!
Sheilah

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I have not forgotten you, or fallen off the face of the earth. I have been having computer troubles, which leads me to my up-coming blog. In the mean time, I think this may be it for today until my darling husband can fix the problem for me.

Sorry.

Sheilah

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Almost everyone knows that pregnancy nutrition is important. What “Mom” eats, the baby eats, and so on. So it’s good to eat healthy right? Of course, it is anyway.

Did you know there is another source of vitamin D besides food and supplements? It one of my favorites actually. SUNSHINE. I love the sun. And today we had a great time doing a little yard work in the sun. It felt sooo good.

So what’s with this vitamin D?

Well, I did a quick search of BMJ on sunshine, because I’m sure that lots of people are affected by the sun like I am. It’s a mood enhancer for me. I don’t like being in darkness all the time.

So anyway, among the search results was this editorial called: Do white British children and adolescents get enough sunlight?

Although, I don’t know if skin color really has a lot to do with it, after all, vitamin D is supposed to be good for everyone’s bones, right? This article suggests that perhaps we can use the sun

to satisfy the body’s requirement for vitamin D throughout the year.

Now I know what you may be thinking. To much sun is bad, shouldn’t pregnant moms avoid the sun, and so on. To a degree, perhaps that may be right.

I’ve never really been one to worry much about sun exposure though, unless we are going to be in it for a long time, say all day, and at peak hours. Then we’ll slather on some carefully selected sunscreen. We did searches for many of the ingredients found in typical sunscreens and discovered that we’d be better off without what we had been buying. It was rather surprising, so we shop a little more carefully now.

Well, I had a much better day today than I did yesterday. I guess I needed some vitamin D provided by that great ball of fire in the sky (the sun, sillies). Maybe that is why I have been loving milk so much lately too?

You know, I couldn’t pick a story for today, so I’ll go with some snap shots of a birth in the buff, outdoors in the sunshine. That’s fitting isn’t it? They are digital photos from the film: “Sacred Birth” and it looks very down to earth, free and open. If I were more brazen, perhaps I’d like to try birthing this way. I have considered putting my birthing pool outside if it’s nice enough and the Mayflies aren’t too bad, but the pool kind of offers a little shelter for “passers by”. That way baby and me could both get our dose of vitamin D.

Sleep tight tonight.
Sheilah

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That’s right, I have a fear. It’ not about birthing at home, or in the water, or even without “assistance.” I’ve done all that before and I know full well I can successfully do it again. So what the heck am I talking about?

I kind of feel like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place. My biggest worry for this up-coming birth is support. And I don’t mean that my husband doesn’t support my home birth water birth decision, he totally does. What I mean is, while I’m in labor, he might not be able to “be there” for me the way I’d like him to be.

I rely on Russell a lot. He’s my best friend. The trouble is, he’s also the Daddy. With four other little ones wanting and needing his attention, I’m not so certain I’m going to get the attention I want and need for that particular time. Any other time, I don’t mind, but a woman in labor needs calm, collected, patient, and unwavering support. This is one reason why I have thoroughly enjoyed my planned home births in the past. We were able to arrange for an extra “helper” to be present which was awesome. This time though, I don’t think that’s going to happen, not the same way anyway. My helper supply is a little more limited this time around.

Well, perhaps I don’t need one anyway. There are lots of women who give birth alone, then go right back to work. We do have some friends with obstetrical expertise, but I’m almost afraid that might get in the way. I like to wait for things to happen on their own, and their experience and training is more geared to “help it along.”

I don’t want to be helped along. The one time I was, it was the least satisfying birth experience I had and my baby came out limp, lifeless, and a terrible color. I know a planned home birth can be just as safe, maybe safer, than a hospital birth. Here’s a short little blurb with the related article linked. It’s called: Giving birth: home can be better than hospital.

I’ve kind of known my fear for awhile, but it really hit home today. Yesterday my own Dad told me he still wished I’d go to the hospital which doesn’t make any sense to me because the one I’d have to go to now is the same one that just a few years ago he didn’t want me having anything to do with. On top of that, he was a little excited about my last two home births, hoping that we’d call him wanting his help (he was an EMT, not an obstetrician, but interested in helping life I guess you could say).

Well, my thoughts are kind of scattered. I need to read one of my older books again, get my thoughts more together and so on. I guess I’m hoping that by conveying my one fear, I can sort it out sooner, because why I find it burdening, at the same time, I know I shouldn’t be afraid.

On that note, I’m going to go read birth stories of women who have done it completely on their own, without even their spouse or a friend there to massage them, hold their hand, or pull their hair back.

This story is called “Peaceful Surrender.” It’s a story at my favorite UC website. Stacy shares her previous childbirth experiences, including a miscarriage, and then she is refreshed by her surrender in the darkness to have her baby girl, without somebody else’s assistance.

Sheilah

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Well, you knew I have to cover this some time, right? Baby names. Where do we get them from?

Naming your baby is pretty important. It’s almost like deciding your child’s fate, but luckily not that dramatic. It’s nice that you have your entire pregnancy to come up with a name anyway.

Depending on where you live, laws vary with regards to naming your baby. You’d almost think there wouldn’t be laws about such a thing, but there are, I guess it’s kind of how “they” are able to keep better track of the world’s population. Here in the USA, the laws to name your baby and have it recorded on a birth certificate, vary by state. Apparently, you may have anywhere from 10 days to 7 years to record your child’s name. (I found this tid-bit in the book: While Waiting).

There are many ways to pick a name for your baby. I’m writing about this topic today, because with less than a month to go, we may have finally come up with one for our baby girl. For each of our other kids, we had a couple names picked out long before they were born, and we were given whatever criticisms we were going to get and we went ahead and named our children what we wanted to anyway. So how have we come up with names?

Ideas for Naming Your Baby

• Favorites - perhaps there have been some names that you have loved since you were a child yourself. Don’t rule them out yet, perhaps you can put your favorite names to use.
• Family - we have all heard of names passed down through the generations. How many King Henry’s were there? We got the name of our oldest from family names. It seemed fitting. For each of my other pregnancies, my mother has handed me a copy of our family tree to offer ideas.
• Friends - a best friend, and old friend, or one whose name you just really like.
• Books - not just baby naming books, but whatever your favorite book may be. Many people chose Biblical names for their children, others like to go with a favorite character in a favorite novel. Maybe even the authors names are unique and appeal to you.
• TV - movies, sitcoms, favorite shows, news anchors, weather reporters, I could probably go on for a long time here, but I think you get the idea. We had names of our favorite actors lined up for two of our children, but ended up going with our alternate choices instead.
• heritage - more than just your family names, but the cultural background too, or perhaps you just like the way a particular name sounds. We have one child with a Scottish name and another with an English name.
• meaning - perhaps you want to give your child a strong sounding name that has the meaning to back it up, or something gentler. There are lots of websites that give meanings for names, but they may vary per site. We have taken this under some consideration when naming our kids, mostly for fun though. Our third son, who has the English name, also has a special meaning to his name.
• historical icons - maybe somebody that just really stands out to you. Perhaps they achieved something you feel was really great, or maybe they achieved nothing but stood for something you believe in. Our second son was named this way.
• your baby - maybe you can ask your baby and see what pops into your head as you look on their tiny new face with awe. Actually, we joked about asking our last one when she got old enough to talk. I suppose if you are in a state that allows you 7 years before you get a birth certificate, you could do that, but I wouldn’t really want to. I will say that we have had two names picked out for each child and we asked our newborn which they preferred and waited for some kind of a “sign.” Anna (our fourth) was the only one who didn’t seem to care either way, so we decided on Anna for her.
• pets - have your heard of the Crocodile Hunter? He and his wife named their first baby after their favorite dog and their favorite alligator.

As for what we will name our fifth baby, well, I guess I’ll know for sure after we do. At this point, we only have the one possibility that we really like, so she might not have a choice like her siblings did. We’ve been going over names for months, and ones that we used to like for our previous kids, just don’t feel right anymore. I guess this new baby needs a new name.

Today’s birth story : On the birth of Abida Jolene (that’s a unique name, huh?).

Why this story?

Well, besides the baby’s name, it’s written by the husband. Most of the birth stories I have read are written by women and from their perspective of course. This story is written by the Daddy, and he tells how they learned and used the Bradley Method (Robert Bradley wrote: Husband Coached Childbirth). His detailing of the story helps to confirm his involvement in what was going on. I like that because that is what family is about to me, sticking together when it really counts.

Okay, there is one small thing I don’t agree with and feel was most likely unnecessary but I wasn’t there. Maybe you can figure it out? All in all though, the story went well, has a happy ending and there are a few nice snap shots to go with it.

Sheilah :smile

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Dr. Grantly Dick Read wrote:

Natural childbirth depends in nearly every case upon the education of the mother; she must be aware of the natural process in order to assist the design.

When I read this, it made me reflect on my past pregnancies, their differences and the different outcomes I’ve had for each. I think the good doctor was making a very good point and a great effort to educate women regarding the different emotional states and sensory conditions they’d encounter during labor.

For my first pregnancy, my husband and I took a childbirth class that was offered by the hospital I labored in. It was conducted by a nurse who worked in the maternity ward of the hospital. She was a very knowledgeable and dedicated nurse. I remember at one point, the class seemed a little “childish” because she pulled out these face pictures depicting different emotions. However, it was really good because she was explaining common mood changes throughout the stages and phases of labor and putting the faces to use with it for the benefit of our birthing “coaches.”

Along with the mood pictures, she would explain different relaxation techniques for our “coaches” to encourage us to try. We practiced these in class as well. We were also told and shown some of the various intervention techniques there were to “assist” labor if necessary. I listened to that portion of class with a grain of salt because I knew already I didn’t want any drugs or interventions. The only assistance I wanted was support to help me achieve birthing my baby without drugs, cuts, or incisions. My family’s experience with childbirth was gruesome enough for me and I wanted a more positive experience than those that they had.

When the day came and went that I gave birth to our first child, it all went relatively smoothly. I threw up once so they ended up giving me an IV, which I objected to because I still wanted food and water but they only allowed me ice chips. Other than that, the support I needed was well provided by my husband, my parents, the nurse on duty, and the midwife on duty. It seemed long and tiresome at times, but I really feel that having that class helped us through it because Russell and I both knew better what to expect.

During the first stage of labor, I got lots of back rubs, and slept between contractions as much as I could. When transition hit, we knew it wouldn’t be much longer. When my water broke, I was fully dilated and ready to push. They brought in a birthing stool for me to try, and I loved it. Russell’s loving arms were wrapped around me for support from behind, and I pushed purposefully with each contraction and rested in between. The fetal monitor, which was also explained to us in class, showed me our baby’s heart rate so we knew he was okay.

After only 29 minutes of pushing, my first baby was born, pink and perfect. Not even any head molding. I don’t know if I could have done it so easily without that class for me and my husband.

My second birth didn’t go as smoothly. I lacked the support I had for my first labor, Russell was pretty much on his own because the nurse and midwife on duty that night seemed to “troubled” to pay any attention to my wants, needs, or feelings. I had wished afterwards that we had taken the class again as a refresher. Yes, I had been through labor once already, and it should have been and “old hat,” and maybe that would have been the case if everything else was the same too.

For my third childbirth, I decided to take matters into my own hands and educate myself, to be better prepared for whatever circumstances might face us. This birth was much better and much more satisfying. I was able to do at home what they didn’t want me to even attempt in the hospital, and when I told my doctor at the time how much the baby weighed at birth, she didn’t believe me until she weighed him herself.

Amazing things are possible when we cast aside fears, learn our bodies signs and signals, and realize that we can make “use of the great gifts of Nature which early civilization had buried beneath the pompous cloak of ignorance.” -Dr. Grantly Dick Read.

He also wrote:

Above all things, confidence must reign supreme; there must be no fear, either for the events of the immediate present or the ultimate result of labor; the earliest sign of anxiety must be challenged, the mind of the parturient woman protected form this great evil – fear.

Remember, “The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.”

Fear has a way of making us our own worst enemies, even when we’ve had a good previous experience.

Sheilah

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