Okay ladies. I know this can be a tough one sometimes. How do you get the birth support you want from your husband?
I know all about the whirlwind of emotions pulsing through your being, I’ve got ‘em too. Luckily, it’s an old hat for my husband, and he’s incredibly understanding.
When you are making your decisions about your birth, it’s good to get his input because after all, it is his baby too. However, remember that all this stuff is going on in your body and he doesn’t know exactly how that feels because he’s not wearing your skin.
Guys may not understand our emotions, or our irrationality, that doesn’t mean we should give up or give in. Do your best to keep yourself together as much as possible, and if you feel strongly about something regarding your prenatal care, your birth plan, or whatever, you need to tell him that, but be prepared to hear him out too. He cares about you and your baby.
Media is plagued with bad news (less face it, it wouldn’t be in the news if it weren’t tragic, at least it’s a very RARE occation that happy things are in the news), and that is probably where your husband gets much of his information. If he’s not getting there, well, also consider that bad news travels much faster than good news, so any buddies that have been through difficult labors with their wives, or any family that has had problems in the past, gets perpetuated.
Keep doing your research and keep an open mind. I am all for natural childbirth, in fact, I’m all for home birth and water birth too, but even I am prepared to take evasive action if I need to. Thankfully, my husband is as sure as I am that I won’t need to, but the fact that I have a back-up plan for our baby’s birth does help put others at ease (and keep them off my back to boot). Plus, having an emergency backup plan is just part of being responsible about the birth.
Some people just aren’t used to following intuition or their heart, they are taught to go with the flow, do as they are told, and so on. If you have researched all angles of childbirth and feel with every fiber of your being that one is better for you than another, you are probably right, but you need to show willingness if you expect the others around you to do the same.
“This is what I am doing, if I should have some medical reason to, I’ll be willing (smart enough) to do that.” Just because you chose a particular birth plan does not set it in concrete, until of course the birth. You can change it as you go if you feel the need to, just make your updated wishes clear to those involved, especially your husband.
Safe birth, smart birth.
Sheilah 
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