Birth | Pregnancy | Blog

While reading another blog the other day, some things were brought to my attention that I hadn’t really thought about before. The blog was vbacadventure and the post was about media births. A commenter, Kara, pointed out some media births (on the show “Friends”) that weren’t the typical horrifying portrayal of childbirth we usually see on TV shows.

I like Kara’s point, but “Friends” happens to be our favorite show, maybe the birth scenes are part of the reason why. The labors that took place over their 10 years on the air were not without “complications” but were all natural birth (without drugs or other medical interventions). Phoebe gives birth to triplets, Rachel’s baby was breech, and Monica and Chandler adopt twins, all of which were vaginally delivered babies. They do make those birthing scenes funny while empathizing with a laboring woman. Laughs during labor can help to ease stress anyway, so it could be helpful to remember these scenes. As they say, “Laughter is the best medicine.” Russell kept me laughing and it helped a lot I think (but so did being on my own turf and doing things my way).

While these TV births aren’t exactly realistic either, I do feel they are more along the lines of what childbirth can and should be. When Rachel is in labor, we even see how labor can be different for each woman. She sits there half distraught because a few other women come in and go to the birthing room while she is waiting to do the same. (Another reason I enjoy home birth, my progress is not compared with anyone else’s.) Each one of those women handled the experience a little differently, just like we do for real. One of them appears to feel practically no pain, as she just makes little “mm” sounds during her contractions and then says, “That was a big one!” afterwards. Another woman is loud, miserable and cussing at her husband, but not because of “pain.”

Obstetricians have been trained for worst case scenarios and anything less than that is a bore to most of them. I don’t think they realize their brilliance when they help a woman successfully give birth to a baby without drugs or medical intervention. It would make all their time in med-school seem like a waste (until the rare occasion where that knowledge comes in handy despite all other efforts, to actually save lives rather than control “progress”). There is certainly a time and place for medical interventions, but the media should not promote them by showing such b.s. so often that millions of women actually expect to need those interventions.

Birth should be a time to celebrate family (like “Friends” also portrays: Ross and Susan agreeing on a baby name, Phoebe settling for being the favorite aunt when she has to “give up” the triplets, Joey promising Rachael she won’t be alone, and Monica not separating the twins),it should not be about fear of pains.

There is no cookie cutter for childbirth, but the dough is basically the same. If we are all starting out with the same kind of dough, our cookies shouldn’t be all that different, but it depends on the circumstances in the kitchen. In other words, in case you didn’t get my metaphors, women are women. We have the same parts that make us women and those parts have the same functional potential. The differences in our labors can be caused by a variety of factors like the support we have or don’t have, our comfort level in our birthing places, the attendants we have, and the tools that are or are not used and the timing of such things.

I personally hate stirrups, unless they are attached to a saddle sitting on a horses back. I feel that when my body is good and ready, it will open up, I don’t need some cold, hard, un-feeling things baring my all for somebody else’s convenience. When the baby is ready to show, the baby shows. Making a woman spread herself this way isn’t going to make childbirth happen any quicker, especially if she’s not comfortable doing such a thing in the first place. The stirrup factor is something I’ve also seen a lot in TV births, along with back laying, fear, screaming, loved ones in the waiting room instead of supporting the laboring woman, and women being portrayed as completely unreasonable, even crazy, during labor. It’s not right.

So for a more accurate portrayal of childbirth in the media, I refer you to “Friends”. Season 5 episode 3 called “The One Hundredth” (Phoebe’s birth of the triplets), season 8 the last episode called “The One Where Rachel Has a Baby”, and season 10 “The Last One” (Erica gives birth to the twins that Monica and Chandler adopt). Also, the first “Friends” childbirth scene was when Carol (Ross’ lesbian ex-wife) gives birth in season 1, the second to last episode called “The One With the Birth.”

It was a great show, well written, with a great cast and some great birth stories given a funny twist to show the lighter side of childbirth.

By the way, every one of those childbirth episodes makes me tear up because they are emotionally griping to me, in a good way. So there are your birth stories for today. Watch ‘em if you can and if you see them during your pregnancy, be aware that you may also cry.

Sheilah

Popularity: 39% [?]

Share This

Technorati Tags: childbirth, natural birth, baby, breech, labor, pregnancy

Since this month is dairy month, and a couple of fire departments/emergency squads are hosting the Meredith Dairy Fest, I thought it’d be kind of appropriate to do this book review in honor of the volunteers that help us out in a an emergency (and their making an attempt to encourage healthy habits, in the case of expecting moms, “Drink milk, it does two bodies good,” unless your expecting more babies, etc.).

Today’s book is a “must have” for any expecting mother, if you ask me. It’s Emergency Childbirth: A Manual by Gregory J. White, MD.

This book is a small spiral bound book that is easy to read and great to have with you where ever you go in the event you should go into labor someplace other than where you intended to and/or if the people around you can read (at least as well and an 8 year old) but don’t know much about childbirth. As long as your “attendants” can read, they can help you deal with labor and can also quickly find out what to do to help if things aren’t progressing normally. This is also a good way to prepare for natural birth because it quickly prepares you which can help relax you because you and your attendant/s know what to do and expect during labor.

It’s an easy read, something you can go through quickly during your pregnancy so that you can also be better prepared in case of an emergency.

I have this book listed first in my post about basic birth supplies, it’s that important in my opinion. While some of the instructions may seem dated, they will still be effective and obviously aren’t all that bad or they would have been modified as there have been many printings of this book. It has definitely stood the test of time.

I have two copies of Emergency Childbirth. One I have as a loaner and the other is sort of a good luck book to me. It was given to my mother shortly before I was born because she had originally intended to have me at home. She ended up going to the hospital anyway (by choice apparently, the doctor that did home birth’s wasn’t available at the time) but she kept the book all these years until I had my first home birth water birth, at which time she passed it on to me. (Thanks Mom ) My loaner copy is a much newer edition but still says almost exactly the same thing. I only found one minor change in a word. The meanings are the same and also importantly, the techniques are the same as well.

Childbirth hasn’t changed, so why should the ways we deal with normal childbirth? Technological interventions were intended for the rare occasions where childbirth is not normal and perhaps dangerous (where as “normal” is not dangerous but still different for every childbirth).

Emergency Childbirth also includes information on resuscitating your baby if needs be. It tells you how to handle the umbilical cord and so on. Do you know how to get your baby to breath if he isn’t breathing shortly after he is born? You should.

This is an excellent book to have. If you don’t already know how to handle emergency childbirth situations, I strongly urge you to invest in this book. It’s a small price to pay if it helps you and your baby, and if you end up not needing it, that’s even better and it’s still worth it.

Take care and birth well,
Sheilah

Popularity: 60% [?]

Share This

Technorati Tags: labor, childbirth, natural birth, pregnancy, home birth, water birth, baby

Have you ever seen Matrix Revolutions? In that movie, the character Morpheus makes a speech that I think is fitting. In Morpheus’ speech to Zion, he says

We are not here because of the path before us. We are here because of the path behind us.

True so true. We are not here because women’s bodies are completely faulty and incapable of baring children. We are here because women’s bodies are more capable of birthing children without complications than some would have us believe.

I was talking with a woman a few days ago (actually, a receptionist at the dentist’s office) and she was telling me about how she had her first child via cesarean and the second was a VBAC. When it came to her third and fourth children, she was told that she would have needed a cesarean had it not been for her previous VBAC. The fact that she has already successfully had a VBAC was the only reason they would allow her to have another, otherwise, they would have cut her open, regardless of whether or not a cesarean was needed. And here I thought VBACs were on the rise. Well, they are, but apparently not in our more rural area. I don’t like how they call the little town where she might have had an unnecessary cesarean, a city. It makes it sound like a pregnant woman might have more choices when in actuality, the choices are fewer unless she is willing to brave labor alone.

The same woman told me the name of a midwife who apparently does home birth in this area, but when I checked it out on line, it said nothing about home births, which leaves me wondering if this women is putting her neck on the line to help women have the birth experience they want or if she’s just out right being reckless, or if there is any truth to it at all. I look forward to speaking with her to find out the scoop (the receptionist is going to get her number for me).

I think birth options are so important. There is not a single time when I think the freedom of choice is more important than when it comes to bringing a new baby into this world. A mother’s comfort in labor is important to the safety of the child. Being comfortable is not being selfish.

Hundreds of years ago, before there were doctors, women were allowed to birth in more efficient positions. Of course, they were likely in better health too, since there weren’t all kinds of sodas, fast foods, and several forms of MSG to make them overweight and nutritionally depleted.

Some people feel that history repeats itself. If that’s the case, then perhaps we need to go back in time a little, long enough to where a woman’s body will be respected as her own during childbirth and not as a matter of convenience for some obstetrician or attending physician. It’s important to have birth options, that is what has kept us going this long already.

Baby’s have been born and will continue to be born. The medical field used to have an oath that started out basically by saying, “I promise to do no harm.” But what is it when a woman is threatened with unnecessary abdominal surgery? I’d say that is harm.

If you want to get stuck in the rear, you should go see a proctologist. If you want to have a baby via natural birth, be sure your physician is not a proctologist in disguise.

If you are facing a VBAC, know that you are not alone. For example, here is the blog of a woman going on her own vbac adventure. (I hope you don’t mind the link Kendra).

Stay positive, stay focused, and birth well.
Sheilah

Popularity: 30% [?]

Share This

Technorati Tags: VBAC, cesarean, home birth, baby, labor, childbirth, natural birth

I guess you could say I’ve had some experience birthing large babies. Our girls were our smallest tying at 8 pounds 6 ounces. The first of our boys was 8 pounds 13.8 ounces, the second 9 pounds even and the third was a whopping 10 pounds 2 ounces.

Okay, so not like the woman in Texas who gave birth to the 14 pounder years ago, but still, not bad if I do say so myself.

Each of them had some form of natural birth, in other words, I took no drugs at all for any of them. The most un-natural part of any of these births, I’d have to say was being in the hospital for the first two. My second birth experience was the most un-natural all together, but more convenient for my attendants. The last three were all home birth water births.

What can I share with you about giving birth to large babies? Now I realize that my babies weren’t huge, but considering that that average birth weight is 7 pounds and I am a person of average to small size myself, I think it’s safe to say my babies were large. (I can hardly imagine a baby as tiny as 7 pounds!) 1 pound makes a big difference when it comes to newborns, 3 pounds an even bigger difference.

Tips for Having a Large Baby

• First off, don’t get freaked out. Stay calm, getting nervous about it won’t help. Tension is the enemy in labor.
• Secondly, realize that it is only very rare cases where a baby is “too big” to be born naturally.
• Thirdly, thanks to the second point, chances are your body won’t grow and sustain a baby you can’t handle giving birth to.
• Lastly, if you are still uneasy, I’m sure there is some hospital staff somewhere that would be more than happy to “put you at ease,” as much as I don’t like to say it, they have the drugs, scalpels, and equipment to intervene should it be necessary or if you so choose.

Things that may help you

Besides staying positive and being calm, these are some other things you may find useful when it comes to giving birth to a large baby.

• support - for all my births, I had my wonderful husband by my side. Also, with my first, my parents were there to help, and for the third and fourth, we had close friends there to help (mostly with the other kids). For the fifth, our other kids were the extra help when needed. The support you have with you should be unwavering. If you don’t have anyone close to you willing to endure childbirth with you, consider hiring a doula, somebody who will stick it out with you and help to keep you calm and grounded.
• birthing positions - learn the optimal positions for opening your pelvis (like squatting is best, hands and knees is good also) and the positions that make it harder to birth in, regardless of the baby’s size (like on your back is the worst, semi-supine also not good).
• mantra - something to repeat to yourself that you find soothing, encouraging, or in someway helpful toward your cause.
• breath – that’s right, remember to breath. Nice, deep and controlled breathing will help you, your uterus, and your baby. I know it may seem silly now, but when you are in the middle of labor, remembering to breath in a more regular manner is not necessarily what you’ll be thinking about.

Possible Mantras

• “I’m going to get huge!” This came from Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth. She had told a woman not to worry because she’d get huge, which is true. Maybe you can’t imagine birthing a large baby, or any baby at all right now, but your cervix and vagina expand and open up to accommodate your baby’s entrance into the world.
• “Waves, waves.” I used this during my last childbirth. I’m not sure why, I guess because I had recently finished Ina May’s book and she and her colleagues refer to contractions as waves and rushes. That seemed more appealing to me, and kind of fitting since I love water birth.
• “I believe…” and fill it in with positive affirmations, like “I can do this.” “I am worthy.” “my body will release.” Whatever works for you.

And so you know I’m not the only one who can give birth to large babies, here is a story for you: Quinn - Fourth baby, 10 days overdue, big baby. Nancy, Quinn’s mom, has had babies even bigger than mine. While I don’t agree with augmentation, it worked out okay for her, thankfully. This story is about the vaginal delivery of her 11 pound baby (and she apparently had an even bigger one before that!).

Nite nite! (As our almost two year old says)
Sheilah

Popularity: 29% [?]

Share This

Technorati Tags: natural birth, home birth, water births, labor, large baby

I’ve had about 10 different blogs dealing with nutrition in one way or another. Basically put, I’ve tried to encourage the importance of prenatal and post partum nutrition.

Today I got an email that links to a report that kind of sums up what I’ve been trying to say. I can’t vouch for the particular vitamins she promotes since I’ve never tried them, but I do trust her judgment, so I wouldn’t mind trying them sometime either.

Jen is a Certified Personal Trainer and Fitness Professional. You may have even seen her on TV. She is the one who wrote the Slim Mom Secrets ebook I have listed on the right side of the page in the Hot Spots section. I know the email intended to be forwarded via email, but I’m hoping Jen won’t mind me posting it here instead. If so, I’ll have to pull it. In the mean time, she expresses the importance of proper nutrition and explains why you need to be aware and even careful about the prenatal vitamins you take.

It doesn’t matter where or how you are planning to birth. That is why I have this listed in each category except birth stories. Good nutrition is our building block to a healthy life, for us and our babies. So, since there is more reading to do else where, I leave you with this:

Here is The 7 Sins of Prenatal Vitamins Report!

I was going to wait to release this important report until after
Memorial Day, but I couldn’t wait a second longer.

You see, after revealing The 7 Sins of Prenatal Vitamins that
many of the big prenatal vitamin companies are trying to get away
with, I’ve been getting hundreds of emails from concerned pregnant
women (and many of their concerned doctors who aren’t up-to-date
on nutritional topics).

With that in mind, do you know what’s really in your prenatal
vitamin? The reason I ask is that an independent consumer testing
agency reported in Oprah’s “O” Magazine that 50% of vitamins,
including prenatals, don’t really contain what they say they do.
Some even had trace levels of harmful toxins! Others didn’t contain
much of ANYTHING!

That’s bad enough, but the prenatal vitamin companies are also
committing some pretty huge offenses that they put RIGHT ON THE
LABEL! (You won’t believe what they’re doing.)

When you visit the link below, you will discover what’s wrong
with almost all of the prenatal vitamins out there today, and you
will learn what is the single BEST prenatal vitamin I have found in
my three months of research.

However, the prenatal vitamin that I do recommend isn’t made by
some greedy corporation. It’s made by a Doctor who is an expert in
the area of nutrition for a healthy pregnancy. The problem is, his
small company only produced 250 of these new prenatal vitamins. And
this email is going out to over 50,000 of my SlimMom Members.

So whatever you do, be sure to read the special report I wrote
by visiting the link below now. At the very least, at least skim it.
You’ll have a head start on everyone else who is already on their
extended Memorial Day Weekend.

Here’s that link: (You may have to cut and paste it into your
address bar)

http://clicks.aweber.com/z/ct/?O.eYb.jyYznIMJBy.XIIjw

With Urgency,

Jen Polimino

P.S. Please do everyone a favor and forward this email to all of
your pregnant friends–even if they’re just thinking about getting
pregnant. It’s that important.

Please, check it out and check your vitamins. You don’t have to use the same ones Jen does, but be aware if you should be getting something better anyway.

Sheilah

Popularity: 32% [?]

Share This

Technorati Tags: prenatal and post partum nutrition

Creating a positive birth experience isn’t as hard as some people would have you think. First off, it is partly a matter of perception. What is your ideal birth experience?

I’d say I just had my best one. It was my quickest progressing, relatively easy, no actual pain to speak of (just discomfort from contractions), and not even the dreaded “ring of fire.” It didn’t happen by mistake, it’s something I’ve worked on. Yes, I feel blessed, and no, I don’t think it was luck.

Have you ever seen The Secret? Well, in that movie, they tell you “What you think about, you bring about.” They speak of the importance of visualization, and actually feeling the experience as well. They even discuss people throughout history that have applied this so called “power of attraction.”

Before I ever saw The Secret though, I read Unassisted Childbirth. Similarly, Laura Kaplan Shanley has a chapter called Personal Beliefs and Expectations which also quotes all kinds of people and their stories and how they seemed to bring about what they were thinking about.

And even long before her there was Dr. Grantly Dick Read who observed that the beliefs women had about childbirth greatly affected the outcome of their labors.

So why all the hubbub?

There must be something to it, don’t you think?

If it is so simple, then why don’t more women have the type of birth experience they want?

Truth be told, sometimes it is hard to overcome all the negative things we are fed about childbirth, it may take a little “re-conditioning” because our society as a whole has been programmed through media and medicine to believe that labor is a dangerous and painful thing, nothing like the natural wonder it really is.

Now as a kid, I always knew I created my own future. Religion has nothing to do with it. Yes, I happened to go to church with my folks, but I have always liked the phrase, “God helps those who help themselves.”

In other words, you can’t reap (harvest) what you haven’t sown (planted). If you want your garden to grow, you have to start by planting something. It doesn’t matter what race, religion, or creed you are, you get out of it what you put into it. So thanks to civilized society, it now takes a little more effort for us to have positive birth experiences.

Faith and belief are wonderful, and very important to creating a positive birth experience. However, it isn’t necessarily faith and belief in God that will get you through. It’s faith and belief that you are going and deserve to have the type of birth experience you desire and then, most importantly, taking the actions to make it happen.

Laura Shanley and The Secret both point out that if you dwell at all on the negative, that is where your energy and focus are, and that is likely to be the experience you will get. These are not the only sources that place importance on faith and belief though.

Ina May Gaskin also accounts several stories where women held onto a fear of some sort which delayed their progress in labor. Once their fears were realized and “released,” their labor was able to progress well again. This is something I did here on this very blog, I shared my home birth water birth fear. Then I was able to discuss it with my husband, and then I was able to let it go. And that problem never came to be.

Hidden beliefs and expectations can affect us too. That is why one of the things Laura Shanley did while she was pregnant was to look for limiting beliefs that might prevent her from having a good birth. She also details many other things she did during pregnancy, childbirth, and afterwards.

In the chapter about beliefs and expectations, Shanley points out the negative things we need to get rid of and the positive things we need to hold close. The negative beliefs being fear, shame, and guilt. The positive beliefs being faith, forgiveness, hope, patience, persistence, humility, love, and courage.

When you can find and release those negative beliefs and feelings, and find and hold on to the positive beliefs and feelings, you will be well on your way to a positive birth experience.

Now I don’t mean to go and sugar coat things. You should still be informed while keeping in mind that genuine “horror stories” about pregnancy and childbirth are really quite rare. Bad news tends to travel faster than good news though, so we seem to be plagued with the bad things which really rarely occur.

Even breech babies can be delivered naturally and without further complication.

The practice of releasing negative thoughts, feelings, and beliefs and focusing of positive thoughts, feelings, and beliefs can be applied to any and every part of your life, including pregnancy, childbirth, and post partum.

Having trouble seeing the light?

In The Secret, they suggest you start by being (and listing) thankful for what you have. There must be something you can be thankful for, even if it’s just that you had a slice of bread to eat and some water to drink. There is always something somewhere, even in the bleakest situation. This is a good practice for quarreling couples too, to list all the things about each other you actually like and are thankful for.

So I think I’ll make that today’s “assignment.” No reading today, unless you want to go find positive birth stories yourself, but make a list of what is right with you. What are you grateful for? What makes you feel good? And then slowly progress into the things you will be thankful for and that will make you feel good. Maybe a great check-up, a head down baby, an easy transition, a breeze of a natural birth labor.

What the mind of man [humankind] can conceive and believe, it can achieve.

- Napoleon Hill, author of Think and Grow Rich

Sheilah

Popularity: 27% [?]

Share This

Technorati Tags: birth, childbirth, labor