That’s right, there are more reasons I’m having a home birth.
Well, you see, after my first hospital birth went so well, (despite the food which was hardly edible to me, Russell is an awesome cook and has me kind of spoiled), I decided to go the same route for our second baby’s child birth. I saw the midwives, many of which I had seen my first time around, and the one I happened to see the most I really liked anyway. I thought we’d work well together, she seemed so holistic.
Early on in labor, December 20th, I stayed at home until I really started to feel uncomfortable because I really didn’t want to be in the hospital for too long. At the same time, I didn’t want to wait to long and be going over wintry, bumpy, back roads while in transition or something.
On the way to the hospital, we stopped at McDonald’s because I figured, “I’ll be damned if they don’t let me eat or drink anything!” I tried to get the healthiest thing I could, which even then when it was healthier than it is now, still wasn’t really “good,” but at least I had some food, and I had also prepared some carrot and celery sticks to nibble on.
(I do not recommend eating fast food, and we don’t at all anymore, not even once in awhile)
Well, I was kind of pleased to see that the midwife I was most familiar with was on duty. They stuck me in a room, way around the corner at the end of the hall. It was not like the last time I had been there. It was very empty, cold, dingy, and had no bathroom. It was the farthest birthing room from the birthing tub and right across from the bathroom that the staff used, so it was kind of a high-traffic area with a very dirty rug. (Maybe the winter time contributed to the dirt and moisture).
The nurse and the midwife checked my cervix, fumbled around with the fetal heart monitor, and sort of got it going, but it kept not working. Then they left for awhile. Russell sat down with a book or his lap top computer and the most awful waiting of my life began.
They would come and go periodically, check my cervix, tell me nothing was happening and that the fetal monitor still wasn’t working properly. All the while both Russell and I were bored senseless.
Then the midwife went on a break and the nurse tried to convince me to let the obstetrician on duty check my cervix, a man I had never seen before let alone met, and I was only just starting to dilate so there was no rush to have yet another person invade my insides. I told her I didn’t mind waiting to which she seemed irritated.
I could hear another woman a few doors down. She kept saying, “I can’t do this, I can’t do this!” I wanted to go and be with her. It sounded obvious to me she had no support what so ever. Nobody was helping her cope in a healthy way and it was driving me crazy.
After an undetermined amount of time, the nurse returned with the midwife. The fetal monitor was still not working well, only just enough now and then to give them an idea that so far everything was okay, my contractions were getting closer and stronger and the baby was handling it fine. Then it would blip out again.
I was almost fully dilated now, but the midwife, who during all my appointments seemed so holistic and patient, started talking to us about ways to speed up progress. Did I mind Pitocin?
Of course I did (and still do)! Well, she could break my water – no I don’t really want that either. Well, I could walk around (on the filthy floors) – okay, I’ll do that some more…
And maybe get in the tub. Sure, I’ll do that too.
When ever I had to pee, I had to cross the hall in my hospital gown. For some reason they didn’t want me wearing a sweatshirt or anything over it. They only gave me a couple of extra sheets and one of those small flannel blankets to keep warm with.
You’d think with the crappy fetal monitor, the cold room in the dark corner, the lack of blankets/warmth, and the shortness of patience that they were really busy, but it was only me and the other woman there in labor. Just the two of us, and I know I wasn’t asking for much. I didn’t dare.
So anyway, by about 3 am, I was really getting tired of the waiting. I had done really well at “willing” my baby to drop down and he was right there but my water still hadn’t broken and I was about 8 or 9 centimeters dilated. The midwife really wanted to break my water and really seemed to think it would help. So I gave in. She assured me it would all be fine, it wouldn’t hurt the baby, and that it would speed things up.
She did the deed, then wanted me to lean back on the bed in a semi-supine position, with my legs way up in the air and push on her command. I said, “Well can’t we try the birth stool?”
“No, I need to see,” was her reply.
“But it worked really well for me last time. Please could we just try it?”
“No, now lean back and get your leg back more. More. Here, now Russell, you hold her leg like that.”
Oh great. This truly sucked _____. (You fill in the blank.)
“Now before we start, what would you like to do for the pain?”
She was offering me some drugs. She knew full and well this was a bad position to deliver in and that it would hurt.
I was instructed to keep my legs up and back (Russell helped with that) and to push, more and more, again and again. All the while I was pushing, she was pushing back (an attempt to help by pushing my cervix around the baby’s head).
By the time I had finally pushed William out, Russell must have been half deaf in one ear (because of my bellowing) and poor William was a disgusting brownish-purple color and lifeless. I don’t remember if the cord was pulsing or not, but they cut it and calmly said, “We’re going to take your baby now and help him.”
At this point I wanted to yell obscenities but said something more like, “Yes, help him!” while gesturing a “do what you need to do/take him and do it.” kind of gesture. They took him to the other side of the room where they suctioned, resuscitated, and massaged him. In the end, he was okay, but it took awhile for his color to return to normal, and the pediatrician thought he looked a bit jaundicy.
The next day, another nurse came in to do a hearing test with some new fangled machine that was supposed to be really super and easy to use. Sure, maybe if you newborn doesn’t mind having a bulky headset on, mine did. Plus the fact that it was working about as well as the fetal monitor from the night before.
When she finally got a reading from it, it suggested that there was a problem with one ear, so we scheduled an appointment for follow-up testing. It turned out the original testing was wrong, both his ears were fine. Six years later, his hearing is still really super, in fact he can hear cars going by on a road we can’t even see that is about a half a mile away. (I can hear them too, but I guess what impresses me is that he was in tune enough to recognize what it was).
In Summary:
- With a home birth, I don’t have to endure any long, uncomfortable car rides, I can stay in bed if I want to!
- At home, I can always count on me. When I’m in labor, I’m concentrating on that task and I have myself surrounded by people (my husband, family, maybe a friend) who will allow me and encourage me to have that focus, rather than worrying about whatever may be on their own agenda.
- I get to choose which room I want to be in.
- My birthing pool can be set up where I want it, within weight limits of our floor
- I can have the room temperature adjusted for my comfort.
- I get to pick which bathroom I want to use and nobody else will be in there in case I want it
- I know how dirty or clean my floors are. I clean them myself, so when they are clean, they are clean, and since we take our dirty shoes off at the door, there is less dirt in the house.
- I have two “machines” I rely on and that don’t let me down as long as I pay attention to their signals. 1 – my body 2 – whatever else I use to keep me occupied during the tedious time of early labor (TV, computer, kids, my husband).
- My progression is not tracked, rather it unfolds which is much easier and less disappointing to deal with
- I don’t have to sit silently and bored. I can watch a movie, check my email, or call a friend with no extra cost
- Drugs, (and other interventions) which I do not want, are not readily accessible for somebody to encourage me to have. This allows me to have the kind of natural birth I desire.
- I choose when I get in and out of my birthing pool and like I’ve said before, there are lots of benefits to that as well…
- the birthing pool temperature is at my comfort level, not too hot or too cold.
- Since we use some awesome colloidal silver that we make for ourselves, any “bad” stuff that might be in the water is “zapped,” making it un-necessary for baby to have eye treatment
- I can birth in the pool if I want. Water birth is another method of natural birth that has been used for thousands of years in some cultures.
- I can use as many or little blankets or clothes as I want.
- Nobody else has the opportunity to leave a mark (hurt), scratch or otherwise, on my baby.
- I have the freedom to birth in whatever position is most comfortable and most effective for me and my baby.
- My legs don’t get numb or achy from being held up by my head
- I only push if I have the urge to push, not when somebody else wants me to. This urge works with my uterine contractions and allows the baby time to recover in between and get some oxygen (which is cut off during contractions and pushing)
- My husband’s hearing remains intact.
- My baby comes out the true normal color, pink. When baby’s are born blue (or worse like William was) it means they have been deprived of oxygen.
- Nobody takes my baby for any reason unless I hand my baby over. There is no need to.
- I know how to resuscitate my baby if I need to (I knew back then also, but the circumstances had me relinquishing control so I went stupid)
- My “born pink” babies never looked like they had jaundice unless they were dressed in yellow. Then their fair skin would reflect the outfit.
- My baby is checked out by a working person with excellent observational skills, not some broken down new technology. (If it weren’t broke, well, then it would have been okay, but it was brand new and not working!)
- The only “back-end” business we create (besides our initial post natal check-ups) is what is truly needed, not just routine.
Home birth makes me happy.
Sheilah 
Recent Comments